I’m making beef jerky… it’s a slow, deliberate process, interesting at times, smells GREAT when mixing the marinade, hands ache with the cold when slicing the London Broil into 1/4 inch strips, but a wonderful investment in time and down home DIY for a guy who just retired early at 62 and awaits his first Social Security direct bank deposit next month. Life is full of little big freight train hurdling down a mountain with the engineer slumped over incidents lately, ole Casey with an arrow in his back, or maybe a bullet hole, and a gold or payroll robbery going on in the parlor cars.
I don’t know. Casey Jones I’m not, though I do suddenly want to hear Johnny Cash’s version of the wreck of the Old ’97. I relate more to poor old Steve.
For background mumbo jumbo, Fox News blares from the den, across the kitchen and into the dining room, where this desk is, also where I mixed the beef jerky ingredients and sliced the beef. That’s all done and now soaking in a triple lined for security marinade for 24 hours.
The news, I suddenly notice has taken on a beefy slaughter tone of its own. Just as I take my heaviest cleaver and skillfully sever 1/4 inch strips of raw flesh off the shrinking end of London Broil number 1 and then London Broil Number 2 until a pile of bloody meat ingots lay in the aluminum roasting pan I am using as a staging area, I am listening to what I realize is a similar gory sort of process unfolding before the American people in Washington DC, that being the dismantling of Obamacare, the very legacy of President Barack Obama’s entire claim to fame, should he wind up with one at all, but as it’s going today,
it looks like he’s headed for a quiet place next to Jimmy Carter at this rate.
Now, I don’t know if Obamacare is as bad as it appears to have proven to be. I tried to read it when it was published originally and people laughed at me for attempting to tackle
the 1200 page behemoth plop factor cut and paste disgrace that was signed into law without ANYONE running their eyes over each and every page with any level of comprehension.
I may be 62, but I’m still intensely idealistic, naive and gullible.
What I find ironic, frightening, even spooky, is the similarity that today’s posturing and sound byte photo op camera grabbing power struggle by both parties to stab each other for maximum wound damage has to not all that many years ago when the statue of Saddam Hussein was toppled in the bloody dusty streets of Baghdad. It took all day. People danced, spit, slapped it with their shoes, apparently an ultimate insult in that region of the world, or was that the body of the REAL subject of the statue some years later? Hmmm. Maybe both.
It’s political porn, really.
I have cleaned up my beef jerky mess, and the body is hidden in the refrigerator for 24 hours of marinating. Tomorrow at this time I will hang each fleshy strip skewered by a toothpick from the oven rack and dry it all out at 175 degrees Fahrenheit, all the life juices dripping into a couple of those big aluminum pans to catch the blood and Tabasco.
I like Beef Jerky, and they say it’s even somewhat of a healthy snack. DIY do it yourself saves money, and no preservatives and all natural ingredients make it even healthier, plus money will be saved.
They hope to accomplish similar results for a nation divided by tearing Obamacare out by the roots and replacing it with something healthier, cheaper, more palatable even.
Good luck America, I love you, and I sure as hell need you healthy. Too bad politics and lawmaking aren’t as cut and dried as making beef jerky.
Be back tomorrow, for part II on the beef jerky. For now, Tweet
The PERFECT PIZZA? How can it be? We Americans are very picky about our pizza, and everyone has a unique idea of what their idea of perfection is.
Yet, one Long Island man, Bill Purkins, a self admitted incompetent and newcomer to the pizza making arena, claims to have created the PERFECT pizza, and he is willing to share it woth the world.
His process, which is based in inexact science, trial, error and careless inexperience, allows him to create a pizza with a graduating variety of crust styles by its very nature guaranteed to fit the preference of nearly everyone. You like a thin crust? Deep dish? Sicilian style? Or anything in between? Chances are that you will get that in each and every slice. How do we do it? Let’s look at a sample slice and the sheer genius will jump right out and stab you in the retina like a an ice pick dipped in lemon juice.
This incredible unedited photo was taken in a kitchen on Long Island, in NY, by its creator, grandfather, empty nest Mr. Mom, fisherman, musician, retired computer programmer, satirist, writer and social media and life coach Bill Purkins, who reveals his secret here:
Simple. I suck at making pizza. One, I’m lazy, and I give up easy. Rolling out pizza dough is a bitch, so by the time I get done with it, it’s a semi-flat terrain of varied thicknesses and textures, anywhere from bar pie wafer thinness to deep dish archaeological dig depths. Everybody wins.
Some 795 million people in the world do not have enough food to lead a healthy active life. That’s about one in nine people on earth. The vast majority of the world’s hungry people live in developing countries, where 12.9 percent of the population is undernourished.
I read that today and cried.
What is spent on nuclear weapons?
As hundreds of millions of people across the globe go hungry, the nuclear-armed nations spend close to US$300 million a day on their nuclear forces.
I read that and laughed.
I know it’s unrealistic, even naive, to imagine spending that Thirty Seven cents a day on food to save 11% of the world, but I bet I could do it. You buy the large sizes you’d be amazed what you can save. Coupons, store membersips, points back if you use that “What’s in YOUR wallet card,” I mean, you buy rice by the hundred metric ton you’re down to 2 cents a serving. Beans, lentils, believe me, I’ve fantasized about this for years.
Get these people healthy, put ’em to work, make consumers out of them, a credit rating, ATM cards, the world economy would be booming.
Alright now, follow closely because this is so cool I’m amazed it hasn’t already been implemented. There’s 24 hours in a day, right? That’s rhetorical, of course…
So, we make it 25. And in the 25th hour, we take time out to explain to everyone we’ve confused or offended or pissed off that day that we’re sorry or we were constipated or temporarily insane or whacked out on some wild street drug manic crazed acting out shit, whatever. And we could all kiss and hug or have make up sex or sing some fruity campfire song or promise to cut that shit out even though it won’t make a pigeon fart of a difference just think how good it’d make us all feel. Especially the make up sex part.
new years day dinner all my life has always been ham, greens and black eyed peas. my daddy’s from texas, nuf said.
well, this year, people must be down on their luck and damned if no black eyed peas to be found, new years eve nor day.
black eyed peas for good luck of course…
after some despair i figured, the hell, i boiled some dried lima beans and some dried black beans and declared, we tried, so put a black bean on each lima bean and you got 3D bugaboo spooky eyes, DIY do it your ownself blackbeye peas.
damn right… sometimes you gotta make your own luck. a little basil, parsely, swig of soy sauce, mustard powder and a squirt of honey and GREAT GOOGLY MOOGLY!!!
i think i invented a new tradition. gotta adapt, folks… roll with the tide and ride with the flow baby…
damn good they were, too.
Are you bummed out because you can't change the world? Maybe your world is too big.